


worth it?

by ocean_clown



Series: addy, wake the fuck up, please [1]
Category: Dare Me (TV 2019)
Genre: F/F, Post 1x10
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:40:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23367859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ocean_clown/pseuds/ocean_clown
Summary: The only thing Addy wants to do when she wakes up is to confront her coach.
Relationships: Beth Cassidy/Addy Hanlon, Colette French/Addy Hanlon
Series: addy, wake the fuck up, please [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1688182
Comments: 13
Kudos: 86





	worth it?

**Author's Note:**

> a little something, i don't even know

_"You think she’s going to protect you. She won’t."_

The sentence resonated in her head, banging against her temples; Beth’s voice like a sledgehammer. The aspirin she had swallowed without water barely eased the headache. Her throat hurt. Addy rolled over to reach her nightstand. She tapped on her phone screen. She exhaled when she didn’t see Beth pop up but her heart raced again at the lack of texts from her coach. Five texts from the cheer squad’s group chat. She couldn’t care less.

Addy kicked the sheets away and laboriously dragged her feet to the bathroom. There was still makeup under her eyes. She had partially wiped it away before going to sleep the night before. It felt like she was on automatic mode. She showered, brushed her teeth, put her hair upin a ponytail, got dressed. She felt angrier every minute passing. Her vision wasn’t clear. How could someone be so stupid? How could _she_ be so stupid?

Her mother was already in the kitchen when Addy entered the room. Coffee didn't seem like the wisest choice considering the state she was in. She poured herself half a glass of orange juice, grabbed a cereal bar on the counter and swung her backpack over her shoulder. Something about her mother felt wrong when she asked her if everything was ok. _Far from it_ , Addy thought.

"I’m gonna be late," she said instead.

"I can give you a ri-"

Addy slammed the door before she could finish the sentence. She needed to be alone. Not in a cop’s car. Let alone her mother’s.

One bite out of the cereal bar almost made her sick. She threw it in the nearest bin.

A dozen of people were around Beth and the girls when she got to the school’s parking lot. She didn’t have the strength to begin to imagine what her teammate could’ve done at the party last night. Riri saw her and called her name. Addy forced a smile and waved at her friend. She couldn’t stomach a normal conversation about party drama.

Addy’s brain processed a tenth of what was being said in class. Every time she tried to focus on something, the picture of Colette looking at her texts, ignoring her, came haunting her mind. At the second English class ended, Addy shoved her books in her bag and made her way to Coach’s office. She wanted answers, needed them.

Addy didn’t knock on the door. Colette startled when the younger girl barged into her office. She closed the file that was open on her desk and stood up.

"I don’t have time right now, Hanlon," she said, not meeting Addy’s eyes.

She left the room, ignoring Addy once again, not bothering to close the door. Her student followed her and slammed the door shut behind her.

"Make time."

Colette walked in the locker room, Addy on her heels. She picked up a towel lying on the ground, left it on a clothes hanger above the benches. Addy took a deep breath and started to ask the same questions Coach had refused to answer twelve hours earlier.

"Why was your hair wet?"

In any other situation, she would've laughed at how silly the question sounded. Not that day.

"I don’t know." Colette rolled her eyes, annoyed, and shrugged. "I don’t remember."

She got a pack of cigarette out of her back pocket and picked one, swiftly passing it between her fingers. Colette’s eyes were as cold as steel. Her voice wasn’t shaking. Addy looked down to see Colette’s black boot frantically hitting the ground. Maybe she wasn’t in total control of her emotions after all.

"Crazy how you don’t know or remember anything about that night, isn’t it?" Addy asked with a clenched jaw.

Colette huffed and looked at the ceiling, letting her head rest against the locker behind her.

"Why didn’t you answer my texts?"

For the first time since their conversation had started, she finally looked at Addy.

"Because things are getting ugly, Hanlon. And I don’t need you standing outside my house in the middle of the night."

The teenager got closer, breathing more rapidly. The anger she had felt in the morning washed over her again. If one of them had the right to be furious, it was Addy. Not her.

"And I didn’t need _you_ to call me in the middle of the night to find a dead body, did I?" Addy quipped loudly. "But you did it anyway."

Colette glanced at the door.

"Keep your voice down."

"Why me?" Addy’s voice broke at the end.

Her question met Colette's silence, hanging heavily in the air. Truth was, none of them had the answer. At least not completely.

"Why did you call me?"

"Because you’re my friend."

"Bullshit." She swallowed at the thought of what she was going to say. Beth had been right all along. "We’re not friends. You’re my coach."

"Addy," Colette whispered.

Her voice was softer. Way softer. Too soft even. God knows that a few days before, Addy would’ve done anything, would’ve killed, to have the blonde woman so close to her she could smell her perfume and feel her heartbeat. Colette twirled a strand of the teenager’s hair around her finger and moved her hand to brush her cheek. Addy moved her head away.

"Don't touch me."

"You need to calm down."

Colette’s voice was back to normal and her choice of words made Addy snap. She backed Colette up against the locker and slammed the palm of her hand on the metal, right next to the coach’s head.

"We’re in the middle of a murder investigation. My mother is on the case. Don’t tell me to calm down."

Addy realized how close she was and what she had just done. She took a step back to breathe. This wasn’t her. Colette let her cool off and waited for her breathing to go back to normal. She put her finger under Addy’s chin, looking for her eyes.

"We haven’t done anything."

" _I_ haven’t," Addy said, pointing at her chest. "For all I know, you could be the one who killed him."

"Don’t be stupid."

"Am I? Why do you refuse to tell me what the hell happened that night?"

"Because I don’t _know_ what happened."

Addy scoffed and nervously rubbed the back of her neck, pacing up and down the room. She was potentially next to a murderer. She was also potentially blowing this way out of proportion. But she was pretty surely losing her mind.

"I can’t force you to trust me, Hanlon," Colette finally said. She walked up to Addy and stared at her with the same cold eyes as earlier. "But we’re in this together. So stop being a brat and get it together."

With that, Colette left the locker room and this time, Addy didn’t follow. She dragged her feet to the back of the room; her head was spinning.

"Fuck."

Addy punched a locker. Once. It hurt but not nearly enough. So she punched it again, and again, and again. She knew it was stupid. The noise was bound to attract people. They would ask questions. And she would have to come up with a lie once more. Tears were rolling down her cheeks, blood down her fingers. She lost track of time. Until she heard a voice at the door and her heart pounded in her chest.

"Worth it?"

Addy wiped away her tears, smearing blood under her eyes in the process.

"What do you want?"

Beth made her way up to her.

"Heard banging on the walls. I was expecting something a little more exciting, to be honest."

Addy didn’t react. Beth took a quick look at her face, then her hand and went to her locker. She came back a few seconds later.

"Sit down."

Addy obliged and did as she was told. Beth carefully held her friend's fingers and cleaned the cuts one by one before dressing the wounds. Addy closed her eyes. Having someone take care of her at that moment felt like she had taken sleeping pills. Finally a break, some peace and quiet for a few minutes, as if someone had unplugged her brain. Once she was done, Beth gently let down Addy’s bruised hand on her thigh. They stayed on the bench for a while. To say it was a comfortable silence would’ve been an overstatement. The tension from the fight they had the night before was present, hovering above them.

Minutes passed. Hours maybe. The shadows on the walls moved. Addy’s tears dried on her cheeks, leaving her skin irritated.

Addy rubbed her temples.

"What the fuck am I doing?"

Beth stayed quiet but let her fingers draw random patterns up and down Addy’s arm.

Addy sniffled. "I messed up, Beth."

"I know." There was nothing else to say.

Beth exhaled loudly. "Damn, she really got you good, uh?"

Addy chuckled but without a hint of humor.

"Come on." Beth clapped her hands, suddenly standing up and extending a hand towards Addy. "Wipe away those tears, Hanlon."

Addy took Beth’s hand and let her lead her to the other end of the room. Beth grabbed the doorknob and turned to Addy.

"We’ll figure this shit out, ok?" Addy nodded. "Chin up, smile on now."

And she opened the door.


End file.
